It must be nice
Have you ever taken a trip somewhere exotic or bought an expensive item, and then listened to the reactions of others around you?
You’ll rarely hear someone ask how long it took to save up the money for an expensive item. In fact I don’t think I’ve EVER been asked a thing like that.
People tend to assume that either you’re just naturally rolling in money or else you must be deeply in debt, and they make comments that go along with those assumptions. If you’re rolling in money, they can feel jealous without worrying about taking personal responsibility for their own monetary state. (”It must be nice.”) If you’re deeply in debt, they can feel superior and self-satisfied. (”Oh I would never do that. I have bills to pay.”)
Why is the concept of planning and patience not even a consideration?
I know there are people out there who take paid-for trips, who save up for furniture, who search out bargains, and who only buy expensive gadgets if they can really afford them. But why don’t we hear more about them? Why doesn’t that idea pop into the heads of others more often? (Or at all?)
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April 24th, 2008 at 4:43 am
Wow, I SO hate the “it must be nice” thing. I have a friend that says that to me all the time when I save up for something. And lately I have been paying off a lot of debt and I get the “it must be nice” from her. Argh! :)
April 24th, 2008 at 7:02 am
The answer to “Why” is because we live in a society of instant gratification.
Why bother saving up for something when there is always “easy monthly payments”? Whenever there is a commercial on tv for a car or electronics store . . . they never say “Save up your money then come on down to Crazy Willie’s car lot!”
They always say “We’ll finance you with easy monthly payments.” Or they say “This tv is yours for only $50 per month”
Planning and patience are rare commodities in todays market.
April 24th, 2008 at 12:24 pm
Oooh that “must be nice” thing really gets my goat, too! I really despise the implication that the event or item in question had nothing to do with my hard work or saving, and everything to do with being lucky. (At least, it’s the jealous sounding “must be nice”s that get me, not the other one where they’re congratulating you and telling you to enjoy it.)
April 26th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
Actually, my husband and I have been asked how we afford our lifestyle several times in the last year. Usually, they are oogling our two Ducatis or wondering how we afford 3-week vacations to Italy or New Zealand. What they DON’T like is our answer: we don’t have cell phones or a television; we cook for ourselves almost every night and maximize our grocery budget by using the crock pot to cook inexpensive cuts of meat; we take the bus instead of driving to cut gas and parking; etc. Their response is usually “oh, I could never do that.” We just shrug our shoulders and mumble something about setting priorities…