bluntmoney.com

My husband and I have been lucky in that we have extremely similar viewpoints about money. I’m slightly more conservative than him in a few areas, and more of a risk-taker in others, but in general we see pretty much eye-to-eye. I think we are a good balance.

But spouses aren’t always on the same page financially, and it can be a huge struggle when you’re in a situation like that. I think that there are two main things you can do to try and improve things in that case.

The key thing is probably to figure out whether or not the issue is really about money. In other words, money may seem like the root of the problem, but is it really?

For example, one person might be a saver, and the other a spender, and so you might argue about whether it’s better to save money or spend it. (Or whether that new item was REALLY necessary, or whether it’s worth trying to get out of debt, etc.)

In a situation like that, try working at compromise and understanding. Look for the point where both of you can be happy. Sometimes it requires accepting the other person as they are, especially if it’s just a philosophical difference that doesn’t damage things financially.

Or maybe one person needs a certain amount of money to spend as they please each month, and the other needs to know that a certain amount of money will definitely be saved in an untouchable account each month. Or maybe there is some other solution that both can agree to, and it’s just a matter of working through it when you’re both calm.

If you think about it, talk it over, come to an agreement, stick to it, and move on, chances are that the difference was really about money. And that’s a good thing.

Because if you think about it, talk it over, come to an agreement, and one or both of you doesn’t stick to the agreement, chances are there are deeper problems. You can tell that this is the case if one or both people only pay lip service to what was agreed upon. When a person says one thing and does another, it’s probably not about the money. Recognizing what it’s really about is what may help.

• Should You Pay for Your Child's College Education? Paying for college for yourself or for a child can drop you into debt faster than many other things. Aside from huge disasters like medical...
• The Two Money Personalities When I first began learning about personal finance, one of the most interesting things that I found was that the entire field was subjective. There...
• Preparing For A Sudden Change It was a great weekend for college football! During the weekend, and throughout the season, I have picked up on a new phrase sports announcers...